I think the reason why it’s so hard to get over your first love is because it’s all you know. They were your first taste of a different kind of happiness, and when they’re gone, they leave you with this bitter taste in your mouth. Yet, you can’t seem to spit it out (refrain from blow job jokes, please). I watched Awkward today and I’m totes team Matty. Jenna had an epiphany as to why her relationships didn’t work out or why she kept subconsciously sabotaging them – she was still in love with Matty; she just didn’t want to admit it to herself. I feel like this is the case for most people who don’t end up with their first love. Sometimes they search for something as good to come and help them forget. But this is the entire struggle. I’ve told my friends: for something that brings so much happiness and light into peoples’ lives, love is very gray. It is not black or white. It just isn’t. In Jenna and Matty’s case, they had the whole flip flop back and forth thing goin’ on. So… She never truly let go. But a majority of people have to learn to let go if they want to be happy again. I’m just gonna say the thing that no one is supposed to say: humans tend to be happier when they are in love, or in a relationship, or have found someone. I don’t know why; that’s just how it works. So before we try to pursue any type of ‘thing’ with anybody, we should ask ourselves if we’re really over our first love – our last love. You can’t kiss someone passionately and unapologetically with that bitter taste in your mouth. You can’t give all of yourself to another person when a part of you still lingers with your ex. It’s very scary and super hard – I get that. But at one point you just have to realize that you need to move the fuck on, not just with exes and future relationships but with your fucking life. Move the fuck on. Take a step forward and try it. There’s a quote that goes along the lines of:
“There are far better things ahead than what we leave behind” or some shit. It’s very true. Those things are behind us for a reason. So get it out of your head that you’ll end up together. Chances are you won’t. Because if you were meant for each other, that person wouldn’t have left or broke you the way that they did. There is someone better for you out there. Who will love every quirk and flaw. Your imperfections will be perfections to them. But just wait. Take time for yourself. Focus on moving forward. Stop fixating on his life; what about yours? He wasn’t the one for you, sweetie, and that’s okay. Right now you be the one for you. Your second love will come around and it’ll be the sweetest taste by far.