Sometimes…

Sometimes I get really sad that I’m not a skinny stick figure. I get sad that I don’t weight 110lbs. I get sad that I don’t always look great in every piece of clothing I try on and I get sad that I don’t like how I look naked. But … Fuck that. You know what’s good? French fries. And pizza. You know what’s sexy? Whatever the fuck you are. What’s sexy is whether you think you’re sexy or not. Confidence. Security. Love. No amount of weight or lack thereof could ever compare to how sexy that is. Salad makes me sad. Trying to not eat makes me sad. Trying to stay under 500 calories a day makes me sad. What the fuck are we doing, girls? How about if salad makes you happy, eat it. If exercising makes you happy, fucking do it. If eating pizza on a Wednesday night while watching Dance Moms makes you happy, then watch and eat.
Do you know how exhausting it is to not love yourself? How my body must feel whenever I’m a bitch to it. “You’re not small enough. You’re not tight enough. You’re not skinny enough” omg shut the fuck up. Like hello that’s so rude.
Every girl and guy and living thing is beautiful in their own way and right. Of course I don’t want to eat so much and do nothing where I gain 50 pounds… Knock on wood. BUT…. I’ll never be a salad-eating girl. I know that. My boyfriend knows that. My friends know that. Now you know that. What’s so great about salads anyway? Put some vegetables on a pizza and there you go… Same shit. Kidding.
Sorry for this rant. Just had a lot of thoughts. It’s terribly sad that almost every single girl is wired to hate something about herself. Other girls hate everything about themselves. It’s hard to crawl out of that hole when society and your own thoughts keep pushing you back into it. But we need to stay strong… I need to stay strong.

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