Stacie has been with her current love interest, Brad, for about two months now. It’s not that I don’t like Brad… It’s just I think he’s a low life loser who needs to die. Nothing against him, I just hope he burns in the pits of hell.
In what world is it okay for a girl to give a guy blow jobs, but him not return the favor? Like, what the fuck is that shit? If a girl is willing to choke, gag, and make her eyes water for the pleasure of getting your dick sucked, the least you can do is eat her out.
So, you can imagine my concern when they’ve been together for two months, and he still has yet to eat me. I know I don’t taste bad…. I’m on a cleanse diet right now.
I know it’s not because I’m ugly, because he has no problem petting me… He just won’t eat me. Oh, and another thing… I HAVE YET TO MEET HIS DICK! That’s right people, we have not had sex. Sure, Stacie’s mouth has met Brad’s dick plenty of times. But have I? NOPE.
Stacie is so dumb, does she not realize she and her mouth are being used? Ugh. I’d give anything to be used…
I don’t know why she’s even bothering with this one. She’s basically doing all the work. And it’s not like I even get wet when she sucks his dick because I know there’s nothing to come… Literally.
I just don’t get it. I’ve always been by her side and she’s just letting this asshole with an average sized dick come between us. Oh, wait, not even come between us, because in order to do that, he would have to put his penis in me. Which he’s not doing!
I think I can keep my cool when it comes to a guy not wanting to eat a vagina. I wouldn’t want to eat one and I am one. But what’s the fun in just getting head all the time? Is he really just that fucking lazy?
I hate everyone right now, including Stacie because she has betrayed her only true friend. And when she becomes shriveled up and old in a nursing home, the joke’s gunna be on her because if by some chance a hot yoga instructor wants to fuck her… I’ll stay dry on purpose!
Who am I kidding… I’d devour his dick.
Okay, well, I hope everyone is having awesome head and awesome sex, because we’re not!
Fuck our lives.